3 Ways to Cultivate Quiet in a Noisy World
This is not a prescription. When it comes to developing a quiet heart, a more soulful way of living, we cannot find a one-size-fits-all. What works for me will not necessary work for you. However, I have found a few principles helpful in determining how to turn down our internal volume.
1. Name the noise.
In order to diminish noise, we must first name its source. Think about what it is that distracts you from connectedness or from being present and still. Whether the noise comes from Instagram, The New York Times, or putting in one more hour at the gym, you can say, “Hey! I see you there, cluttering up my mind and emotions.” By simply naming the thing, its power over us diminishes.
Perhaps we won’t stop running, reading, or scrolling entirely (no need to jump to extremes), but by naming the noise, we reorient our lives so that nothing is louder than our connection with God and our relationships with people. By turning down the volume, we can then invite the quiet to enter in.
2. Practice the rule of opposites.
A few days ago, Ben and I hiked through a forest in southern Indiana. The trees had not yet given way to spring, so we were surrounded by brown below, beside, and above us. The only color that poked through was a blanket of blue sky. It was not my first choice of activity for the day. We had rented a cabin, and the idea of wrapping myself in a blanket in front of the fire and settling into a good book was certainly more enticing.
But the more I moved, the more I felt my mind relax. The more I noticed the gurgle of a nearby stream and the smell of the earth waking up. Even when my out-of-shape body began to ache, my soul seemed more alive. I felt like Nora from The Midnight Library, when “The quiet made her realise how much noise there was elsewhere in the world. Here, the noise had meaning. You heard something and you had to pay attention.” [1]
You see, my internal noise often stems from getting caught in my head. I let thoughts ruminate, churning so loudly that I lose touch with the life that’s in front of me. For me, the best way to push back the noise is to embrace the opposite: to move my body or to engage the other senses. Doing so pulls me out of my mind and allows me to be more whole and more engaged in the moment. I free myself to pay attention.
Abraham Herschel wrote, “A man who works with his mind should sabbath with his hands, and a man who works with his hands should sabbath with his mind.”[2] To find quiet, a restful place to let your soul breath, does not necessarily mean doing nothing. Rather, we can employ the rule of opposites. If your soul is cluttered from a spinning mind, move the body. If your soul is weary due to a weary body, stop moving and engage the mind. Find ways to add more of your senses into the equation.
As you do, I think you will find your own unique ways to invite silence into your soul and your daily life.
3. Focus on presence, not outcomes.
We live in a culture that embraces process in order to achieve outcomes. We want what is on the other side more than the experience of getting there. And with many circumstances, that’s understandable. No one is thrilled about a raw season of grief, even if it does lead to healing or to empathy.
But even in situations we do not want, we can pursue a quiet heart—a soul settled in knowing God rather than knowing what is ahead.
While there’s value in thinking about the past or the future, we cannot live there—no matter how hard we try. The best way I have found to minimize a noisy heart, mind, and body is to live in the present. A life of presence is a life of paying attention, pausing, cultivating curiosity, asking questions, responding in compassion, confessing, gathering, telling our stories, listening to the stories of others, and engaging with the world in the most authentic way we know how.
Quiet is worth pursuing—even when, or perhaps especially when, it doesn’t come easily. Whenever I am tempted to give up, to choose booze and bingeing over ten minutes of deep breathing, I remind myself of this: Solitude is not an act of pulling away but of pulling into the heart of God. The quiet is not a limitation, but an invitation into presence.
More PRACTICAL EXAMPLES for PURSUING QUIET
I asked a few of my friends how they implement silence and solitude into their busy lives, and I love their answers. They represent the myriad ways we can pursue a quiet heart, and perhaps you will find a few ideas for your own journey.
“[My husband] keeps my phone at his desk during the day so I'm not tempted to go a million different directions with my phone handy.” —Nikki
“One thing I’ve recently started doing is utilizing the One Minute Pause app by John Eldridge. It prompts you to pause and meditate for one minute at a time throughout the day and gives some guidance for your thoughts to bring your heart back to Jesus.” —Kayla
“In this season of my life with three little kids, I embrace moments when I can be “alone” with God even if there is chaos around me. The other day, I was sitting in my kitchen with all the kids around, but my favorite worship song came on Pandora. By listening to the words and looking out the window, I was able to have a few moments of communion with God. It helps me to not always wait for literal silence and solitude, but look for and receive those little moments as they come throughout the day.” —Kathleen
“I am . . . clearing clutter out of what I ingest in terms of information. As someone who loves to learn and engage in new resources, I find I can allow myself to become overwhelmed with information that may or may not be healthy for me at that moment. It's not about good or bad information, but rather about listening to what my soul needs in that season.” —Joy
“I walk the dog each morning (even though it's my kids' chore). While walking her for five minutes before the day begins, I just listen to whatever sounds I can hear around me and enjoy the quiet.” —Brooke
For additional ideas, you may also want to check out this post: “Resources for the Pursuit of Presence.”
REFLECT:
What sources of noise keep you from being present?
NEW POSTS EVERY MONDAY (& SOMETIMES MORE)
NOTES:
[1] Quote taken from The Midnight Library: A Novel by Matthew Haig.
[2] I found this quote in The Common Rule: Habits of Purpose for an Age of Distraction by Justin Whitmel Early. Original source unknown.
feature image: Atharva Tulsia via Unsplash
