If You Send The Kids To Grandkid Camp…
A cautionary tale about birth control, an empty house,
and pushing the parental reset button.
If you send the kids to Grandkid Camp,
Mom will have some extra time.
She’ll grab a mop and deep clean the house
to get rid of all the slime.
And if Mom deep cleans the house,
She’ll want to organize it too.
She’ll say goodbye to tubs of newborn clothes,
the Bumbo, and the Jumparoo.
Tired from all her efforts,
Mom will be ready to relax.
She’ll settle down with a glass of wine
And enjoy a bubble bath.
And if Mom takes a bubble bath,
She’ll be feeling good indeed.
She’ll want “special time” with Daddy,
But the calendar she will not read.
If Mom and Daddy kiss and cuddle,
They will think, “Wow…This is great!
We can’t wait for kids to be out of the house.
Life will be one big date!”
Little do Mom and Daddy know
That they have reset that clock.
Their apparent misuse of birth control
Has added yet another to their flock.
The kids return from Grandma’s house,
And Mom gets back to being busy.
Until five weeks later when she starts to feel
Nauseous and quite dizzy.
And when Mom looks at the calendar,
Her stomach will fall into her shoes.
Three pregnancy tests later, the truth is out:
Another baby is coming soon.
If you find out you are pregnant,
And your youngest is only 8 months old,
You’ll send your kids back to Grandkid Camp
So Daddy can get permanent birth control.
The End…we think.